You’re not fundamentally opposed to a picnic.
Crusty French baguettes. Freshly sliced salumi. Champagne and sweet nothings being whispered in your ear.
But what you are opposed to is walking around the city carrying a picnic basket.
So we found a guy with a tricycle who’s willing to help.
Presenting Perfect Picnic, a new Lower Manhattan–based delivery service that’ll bike a hobo sack filled with lawn-appropriate provisions to any nearby park (or apartment rooftop, for that matter), available now.
Before you can effectively enter into the world of on-demand gourmet picnic delivery, there’re a few things you’ll need: 1) a gingham blanket, 2) a place to spread it and 3) an elementary grasp of how to order food over the phone.
With requirements met, companion obtained and shaded grassy knoll procured (they’ll deliver downtown for now, and to Central Park soon), you’ll get on the horn and begin custom-building lunch. Some of the foodstuffs you’ll want to put in the basket: whiskey sour pickles, horseradish bacon spread and a whole gang of locally cured meats.
Of course, if you know to ask (and now you do), there’s also a full secret menu of unlisted supplies that they’ll be willing to bring loyal customers. Namely, a disposable charcoal grill and North Country Smokehouse hot dogs with natural lamb casing.
You’re gonna need a bigger blanket.