We say, “New Year’s resolutions.” You say, “Juice cleanse.” Then we shake you out of that nonsense and present you with five significantly better ways to kick off 2016. One of which may or may not include taking shots out of bones. Sorry for hypothetically shaking you back there.
RESOLUTION: EAT LESS SUGAR
Here’s a resolution for you: never eat an ice cream sundae again without a private string cello performance. Even better if that sundae’s topped with syrups made from three rare dessert wines. And costs more than three grand. Three Twins will happily oblige all of the above, by the way.
RESOLUTION: DRINK LESS
Taking shots may be a bit questionable in most situations. But not taking shots when they’re served luge-style from a bone that was holding some smoked bone marrow that you just drank is… well, it’s unacceptable.
RESOLUTION: JOIN A GYM
Instead of joining a gym, maybe you should join the secret, members-only clubhouse behind the scoreboard at AT&T Park instead. It’s where you’ll find a bunch of old-school Giants memorabilia, a bowling alley and cocktails with baseball-shaped ice cubes in them. It was that or “circular” ice cubes.
RESOLUTION: BE ACTIVE IN NATURE
Big Sur is known for its beautiful redwood forests, rigorous backpacking opportunities and some pretty great surf. The Surf & Stay package at the Post Ranch Inn is known for its champagne, nine-course dinner and ocean-view house with a private hot tub. But you’re here to surf, remember?
RESOLUTION: MAKE SOUND INVESTMENTS
Your 401(k). Tesla stock. Sound investments, all. But you know what else is? Custom-designed barware collections featuring $2,250 wooden boxes filled with glasses and tools, a $2,600 bar cart and all of the high-end spirits you can imagine from the Bank at Wingtip.
